Fillies and Colts Wrestling (Birthday Gift)

(Author’s Note: All the ponies here are anthropomorphized, like in ’s pictures. This is a birthday gift for him, after all.)

   It was a clear and cool day in Ponyville. Ponies were going about their business, having fun, doing work, or trying to save the world from the latest disaster. It was calm and peaceful (at least as peaceful as Ponyville can be), but elsewhere it was quite a different story.

   Over in Sweet Apple Acres there was quite the scene. Not far from the barn there was a wrestling ring. The thick ropes were apple red, and on the side of the ring the words “Fillies and Colts Wrestling” had been painted on. There was a large audience of...two. Rainbow Dash and Rarity sat on some picnic chairs near ringside. There were actually four audience members if you counted Applejack and Big Mac who were working nearby.

   A little ways away from the ring was a table, with two colts sitting behind it, each equipped with a beat-up, old head headset. They were chatting when they noticed Featherweight was holding up a video camera and signaling them.

   “Oh! Welcome back to FCW, ladies and gentlecolts,” said Pipsqueak. He was wearing khaki pants, a white shirt, and a dorky blue sweater vest. He was also sitting on a phone book to appear taller. “I’m Pipsqueak, still here, and I’m joined as always by Shady Daze. Shady how are you?”

   “I’m doing well,” replied Shady. Shady was wearing a suit and a bright red bow tie, giving him a more distinguished look than Pip. “I’m excited for our next match-up.”

   “As I am. We’re about to have a match pitting the Crusaders against Fancy and Free. We’ll see how that plays out right now.”

   Zipporwhill was in the ring and wearing a referee shirt. She was also pulling double duty as the ring announcer. “The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall!” she intoned, “Introducing first, from Ponyville, Equestria, weighing in at a combined ninety-eight pounds...The Crusaders!” Featherweight dashed over to a CD player and hit play. Some generic, but fast paced rock music flowed out of the player.

   Out of the barn stepped Scootaloo and Apple Bloom. Scootaloo was wearing long, baggy, red pants with flames on the side, a red tank top, and a red mask with flames on it. Apple Bloom meanwhile wore just a pair of plain overalls. Both wore black knee and elbow pads, wrestling boots, and their Cutie Mark Crusader capes.

   They waved and smiled as they made their way to the ring. A huge cheer went up from the audience. That is to say Rainbow dash was cheering very loudly, practically falling off her chair. Applejack looked up from her work and cheered. “Alright, Apple Bloom!”

   As the pair entered the ring, Pip said, “Of course Apple Bloom and the Phoenix are very well respected wrestlers here in FCW-”

   “Yeah, if you don’t mind being lectured at about ‘finding your true self’ or whatever,” commented Shady Daze, cutting Pip off.

   “Hey now, they have an important message to share,” protested Pip.

   “If I wanted a message like that I would go read one of those two bit self help books you can get at the used bookstore.”

   “Oh will you stop!”

   Before the two could continue their bickering Zipporwhill began to announce the next team. Behind her the Crusaders had ditched their capes and were waiting for their challengers.

   “And introducing their opponents, from Canterlot, Equestria…” The mention of Canterlot got a boo from Rainbow Dash. “Weighing in at a combined one hundred pounds...Fancy and Free!” Once again Featherweight dashed over to the CD player, and this time played a piece of classical music.

   From the barn emerged Silver Spoon and Sweetie Belle. Silver Spoon was wearing carefully crafted pink tights and a puffy white shirt, over which she wore a pink, fancy-looking vest. Sweetie Belle had on a one piece swimsuit that had gradient of pink fading into baby blue. White ruffles had been sewn in around the legs, as had some white sequins around the neck area. Both wore white knee and elbow pads, but only Silver Spoon wore white boots as Sweetie was barefoot.  

   Rainbow Dash booed them as they walked towards the ring. Rarity however gave a big cheer. “Hurrah!”

   Sweetie blushed and glared at her sister. “Rarity,” she hissed, “We’re the heels, you’re supposed to boo us!” Featherweight had wisely jerked the camera away and instead focused on the reactions of the Crusaders. Sometimes he felt like he was the only pony preserving Kayfabe.

   “Oh, sorry darling,” replied Rarity. She cleared her throat and tried again. “Boo! Boo I say! You dastardly...villains!” Sweetie smiled with glee and hurried to the ring.

   “It’s unusual to see a team that is comprised of someone like Lady Silver and Sweetie Belle,” commented Pipsqueak, “But they swear that, despite their differences, they work well as a team.”

   Sweetie Belle entered the ring, with Silver Spoon staying on the outside of the apron in one corner. Apple Bloom left the ring and stood outside on the opposite corner. Inside Scootaloo got ready and stared down Sweetie Belle. Sweetie tried to stare back, but began to crack up looking at Scootaloo’s face.

   Zipporwhill stood between them and then called for the bell to start. Featherweight rung it and she backed off as the two competitors locked up in a Collar and Elbow tie up. Scootaloo proved to be more powerful of the two and Marish whipped Sweetie Belle into a corner. Scootaloo jumped over with an elbow to the face and then several chops.

   “Ooo, it looks like the Phoenix has Sweetie Belle tied up in the corner there,” said Pipsqueak. Sweetie Belle desperately waved to Zipporwhill who rushed over and held up her hands in between the wrestlers. “It looks like the ref is breaking them up-” While Scootaloo was distracted Sweetie Belle gave her a hard punch to the face, knocking her off balance. “Oh, and a cheap shot by Sweetie Belle!”

   “That’s called being smart,” replied Shady Daze, “She saw an opening and took it!”

   Sweetie grabbed Scootaloo and whipped her into a corner. She then leaped at her hip first, crashing into her. Scootaloo was squashed between Sweetie Belle and the Ring Post.

   “Oh, a hip attack from Sweetie Belle,” remarked Pip.

   “That’s what makes her so dangerous,” said Shady, “She can use any part of her body, from head to toe.”

   After delivering a few stomps to her fallen opponent Sweetie Belle picked her up and laid her against the corner. She ran to the other side of the ring. Then she began to cartwheel towards Scootaloo, with the intention of delivering an elbow to the face. But at the last second Scootaloo dodged out of the way and Sweetie Belle rammed into the ring post. She started to wobble back towards the center of the ring when she was meet by a dropkick.

   “And it looks like the Phoenix has taken control!” announced Pip.

   Scootaloo was in the process of picking Sweetie up when Silver Spoon started yelling at Zipporwhill. She wandered over to Silver to see what was the matter. As she did so Sweetie Belle poked Scootaloo in the eyes.

   “Oh, is that another example of Sweetie Belle being ‘smart’?” asked Pip.

As Scootaloo stumbled back, Sweetie escaped the hold and ran towards her tag partner. Scootaloo recovered and ran after her, but before she could lay her hands on her, Sweetie Belle tag out, and Silver Spoon stepped in.

   “And now Lady Silver is in,” observed Pip, “The Phoenix is going to have to change her tactics to deal with somepony with more power behind her.”

   The two fillies faced each other, and then Silver Spoon hit Scootaloo with a forearm smash. Scootaloo retaliated with one of her own, and they went back and forth until Scootaloo ducked under one of Silver’s and ran towards the ropes. She bounced off the ropes and clothes lined Silver Spoon. Silver stumbled and Apple Bloom ran into the ring. As Zipporwhill began slowly counting to ten as the Crusaders performed a supplex together, throwing Silver to the ground.

   “Excellent teamwork by the crusaders there,” remarked Pip as Apple Bloom scrambled out of the ring. Scootaloo went for the pin, and Zipporwhill began to count.

   “1...2-” Suddenly Sweetie Belle ran in and kicked Scootaloo off her partner, breaking up the pin. Sweetie ran back to her corner.

   Scootaloo picked Silver Spoon up and began to run to the ropes. She bounced off one side and leap frogged over Silver, setting up for a big move. As she did so though, she accidentally knocked Zipporwhill’s glasses asscue. She made it to the other side of the ring, when Sweetie grabbed her leg, causing her to trip.

   “And it looks like The Phoenix tripped,” remarked Shady Daze.

   “Sweetie Belle grabbed her leg!” countered Pipsqueak.

   “I didn’t see anything, and it didn’t seem like the ref did either. The Phoenix is well known for her clumsiness.”

   “Oh will you stop!”

   The underhanded tactics on display got boos from the crowd.

   “Come on ref!” shouted Rainbow Dash.

   In the ring Silver had recovered and picked up the prone Scootaloo to deliver a chicken wing gutbuster. Scootaloo landed hard on the mat clutching her stomach. As she rolled over onto her back Silver walked over her, pressing down hard. Scootaloo jerked over and got to her knees. She began to head over to her corner where Applebloom was waiting with an outstretched hand for the tag.

   “Come on!” encouraged Apple Bloom.

   As Scootaloo began to make her way over Sweetie Belle suddenly dived into the ring and ran in front of her, cutting her off from Apple Bloom. Silver took this time to go for a roll up pin. Zipporwhill began to count. “1…” Scootaloo managed to kick out, and Sweetie once again hopped out of the ring.

   Silver Spoon again lifted Scootaloo by reaching one arm between her legs and another arm around her back. She dropped Scootaloo chest first onto her knee.

   “And another attack to the Phoenix's body by Lady Silver,” observed Pip.

   “This is a good strategy,” said Shady, “Hurt the phoenix’s core, and she going to have a hard to time doing all those high flying moves of hers.”

    Silver followed up with a nice standing moonsault on the prone Scootaloo. She then picked Scootaloo up and brought her towards the corner where Apple Bloom was. She lifted Scootaloo’s hand and extended it towards Apple Bloom’s as if to let her tag out. Then she suddenly pulled it away.

    As Silver went to do it again, Apple Bloom reached as far as she could, hoping to take advantage of the taunting. But as she did so Sweetie Belle suddenly crawled out from under the ring. She had commando crawled under it and now popped up behind Apple Bloom, and grabbed her overalls. She pulled, dragging Apple Bloom off the mat, stopping any tag that might have taken place. She then ran back to the safety of her corner.

    “And a dastardly move there by Sweetie Belle,” said Pip.

    Having had her fun with the taunting, Silver whipped Scootaloo into the ropes across the ring. A she bounced off Silver prepared to deliver what could be a knockout blow. But then Scootaloo seemed to recover, leaping onto her shoulders and delivering a headscissors takedown, throwing Silver to the mat with her legs. Scootaloo stood up and stumbled to Apple Bloom’s corner, finally making the tag.

    The crowd went wild, with even Big Mac joining in the cheering of the hot tag. Silver slowly stood up and Apple Bloom got into the ring.

    “And now Apple Bloom has tagged in,” said Pip excitedly. Silver saw Apple Bloom advancing towards her and began to back off, visually pleading with Bloom to let her go. “And Lady Silver wants no part of her!”

     Apple Bloom then ran at Silver, who ran back to her corner and just managed to tag out with Sweetie Belle. Sweetie Belle stepped in and charged at Apple Bloom, trying to deliver a spinning heel kick. Apple Bloom caught it though, and used it to spin Sweetie around. She then picked up and Sweetie and dropped her backside first onto her knee, delivering an atomic drop. Sweetie fell forward and collapsed on the ground. Apple Bloom picked her up into a fireman's carry and fell backwards, crushing Sweetie.

     Sweetie was totally out of it, and Apple Bloom took advantage by picking her up again and bringing her to a corner. She got into position for a belly-to-back suplex. At the same time Scootaloo climbed up onto the top turnbuckle.

     “And it looks like the Crusaders are ready to finish this,” said Pipsqueak, practically out of his seat (or off his phonebook), “They’re about to delivering The Destiny Destruction!”

     Before they could however, Silver Spoon ran back into the ring, tackling Apple Bloom. Scootaloo was already jumping and so the four fillies ended up in one big pile. Zipporwhill began counting, but none were moving to get up.

     “Oh no!” exclaimed Pip, “Could it be…”

     “A cuddle puddle,” said Shady Daze sadly, “I don’t think any of them are getting up anytime soon.”

     Zipporwhill finished her ten count and called for the bell. “Double Countout,” She announced after it had rung, “And so a no contest!”

     “That’s the danger of being a business where you and all your opponents and partners are so fluffy and cuddly,” remarked Pip.

     “Before we go,” said Shady Daze,” We have a special video, courtesy of our illustrious general manager, Diamond Tiara.”

     Featherweight made his way over to a TV and put a tape it, and then focused the camera on it.

     On the TV a piece of cardboard was being held up by a hand that certainly did not belong to Featherweight, no sirree. It had writing on it in black sharpie that said, “And now a special preview”. The cardboard was pulled out of frame revealing Twist, dressed in a suit much to big on her small frame. The background behind her was dark and she was lit by a flashlight.

     “I have newth for all of you in FthCW,” she said, rubbing her hands together evilly. “You’re all abouth to get a wake up call. Becausth my neweth client is coming.”
The lights suddenly came on, revealing Babs Seed with her back turned. She suddenly noticed the lights had turned on and quickly turned around. She was wearing MMA gear and began to glare menacingly.

     “And she isth...the beath...the conqueror…Babth Seed!”

     The video faded out and Featherweight returned to filming the two announcers.

     “Very ominous,” remarked Pip, “If you want to find out more tune in next week for...Fillies and Colt Wrestling. To everypony at home I’m Pipsqueak, and on behalf of my partner, Shady Daze, I would like to say goodnight!” He and Shady Daze waved as the camera shut off.